Crazed Romney runs over Sen. Craig with bus

Monday, October 15th, 2007 - 7:46 pm PDT

Republican candidate for president Mitt Romney surrendered to police today after details became public about a bizarre recent incident in which an enraged Romney used his campaign tour bus to run over one-time political ally Senator Larry Craig of Idaho. “[Romney] threw me under his campaign bus,” stated Sen. Craig. “He not only threw me under his campaign bus, he backed up and ran over me again.” Though Romney is expected to plead guilty to attempted homicide, he is also expected to later take back that plea, and then to defy his fellow Republicans’ recommendation that he drop out of the 2008 presidential race.