Smith has two months to put affairs in order

Sunday, June 24th, 2007 - 6:32 pm PDT

The Rev. Brendan Powell Smith shocked family, friends, and fans today with an announcement that he has two months to put his affairs in order. “For far, far too long,” stated Smith at an emotional press conference this morning, “my affairs have been left in a state or terrible disorder. I am now giving myself two months to do all that I humanly can to return them to something more closely resembling an orderly state.” To prepare for this monumental task, Smith has purchased several large file cabinets, some accounting software, and a new mop. “I never thought this would happen, not to Brendan,” stated one close friend, “he’s so disorganized.”