Smith gives a shit

Friday, December 1st, 2006 - 8:05 pm PST

In an impromptu speech delivered at an area Wendy’s today, The Rev. Brendan Powell Smith sought to dispel recent rumors by announcing to a surprised and mildly curious lunchtime crowd that he is “someone who truly gives a shit”. “In a world marked by ever increasing apathy and cynicism,” said Smith, reading from prepared remarks, “too many people of my generation just do not give a shit about anything. That’s not me.” Smith proceeded to list off more than thirty-five causes or entities about which he “truly and deeply gives a shit” before sitting down and finishing his 1/2 pound Jalapeno Cheddar Double Melt and Biggie Fries. He was last spotted heading toward the restroom.