Archive for July, 2006

Study links obesity, XXXL clothing

Saturday, July 29th, 2006

Could the clothes you buy determine your weight? A new $3.2 million H-Net/Fritz Media study has revealed a very significant statistical correlation between the purchasing of clothing in XXXL sizes and obesity, and a corresponding correlation between purchasing sizes M and S with low body weight. Perhaps most surprisingly, the study found that people used to purchase XXXL clothing, but have since switched to purchasing smaller clothes sizes are also very likely to have lost a lot of weight. So the next time you go shopping, you may want to head over to the petite section, even if they’ll need to use a forklift to get you over there!

The Brick Testament: Jesus’s Teachings

Saturday, July 15th, 2006

Our lord and savior Jesus Christ is best known for getting himself killed by the Romans and thereby somehow granting us eternal life, but it’s a little known fact that he is also considered a world-renown moral teacher. No less an authority than US President George W. Bush once named Jesus as his “favorite political philosopher“. Today The Brick Testament launches a new section of the website devoted to illustrating Jesus’s Teachings. It’s called, appropriately enough, The Teachings of Jesus.

Smith checks himself before wrecking himself

Sunday, July 9th, 2006

Following the advice of a concerned and vaguely threatening peer, Rev. Smith today decided to take a moment out of his busy schedule to check himself before wrecking himself. “I was skeptical at first, not having realized that I was on a path to self-destruction, but I now feel extremely fortunate to have taken the time to examine my recent behaviors and motivations, making changes where necessary to better myself.”