War on Terror finally over

Saturday, January 21st, 2006 - 7:41 pm PST

With America’s acceptance of the truce offered by arch-nemesis Osama Bin Laden, the long fought War on Terror officially ended today. The terms of the truce, deemed acceptable to both sides, involve the US bringing home all of its overseas military personnel from the Middle East, and a complete cessation of all Islamic fundametalist terrorist attacks worldwide. Americans celebrated the end of the war by scraping yellow ribbon bumper stickers off their SUVs and by keeping their shoes on as they passed though airport metal detectors. For the first time since its inception, the US Department of Homeland Secuirty’s advisory system has been set to bright green for “Totally Safe”.