Smith diagnosed with jimmy leg

Friday, January 13th, 2006 - 9:33 am PST

After another night of having her sleep rudely interrupted by the spasmodic jigglings of her partner’s leg, Rev. Smith’s girlfriend forced him to go to the hospital last night where, after a battery of x-rays, blood tests, urine and fecal samples, doctors diagnosed Smith with a condition known as jimmy leg. “There is no known cure for jimmy leg,” said Smith, reading from a pamphlet given to him by a nurse on his way out of the hospital, “but it’s symptoms can be reduced by cutting back on the amount of caffeine consumed just before bedtime.” Added Smith: “Hunh.”