US anti-Freedom sentiment grows

Tuesday, April 1st, 2003 - 2:21 am PST

Beginning with newly rechristened “Freedom Fries” in the US House of Representatives cafeteria, a wave of anti-Freedomism has swept across the nation in response to that country’s lack of support for the US-led invasion of Iraq. On Monday, the US government ordered all globes and world maps to be recalled so that the country of Freedom can re-labelled. “We choose to take the high road in this matter,” commented US president Bush, “It is only by changing what we call those naysaying foreigners that we can maturely teach them a lesson. If the people of Freedom are going to be anti-US, then you can bet the people of the US will just as surely be anti-Freedom.”