Smith takes candy from baby

Tuesday, January 15th, 2002 - 2:20 pm PST

In a move that has sharply divided critics, Smith yesterday took candy from a baby. He then ate the candy as the baby looked on, weeping loudly. “With this seemingly abhorrent act,” noted a local anesthesiologist, “Smith has actually reached out compassionately, saving this child from the dangers of tooth decay and potential obesity, while taking on these risks for himself.” Said another local passerby, “what an asshole.”